My Knight In a Green Vest
by GrievousHasABadCough
Summary: With all of her memories gone after two ninja tried to make her a jinchurikii, Inoue Uzumaki wasn't concerned with her past at all. She was more concerned about her new boyfriend, Kakashi Hatake. But Kakashi had a secret he knew would make their relationship crash and burn: She doesn't remember, but he killed her older brother. Rated T. OC X Kakashi and Hidan X Kakuzu pairing. AU
1. Prologue

Inoue Uzumaki loved what was left of her family. Her older brother Ryuji was a jonin in the Hidden Leaf village, and was a very skilled ninja. Her Mother and father were excellent ninja too. But for some reason, Inoue was not. She loved to _watch_ the others train to be ninja, but she said to her brother years ago she wasn't really into that line of work. She was still thinking about what she would be.

"Oh, that's right! Today is Ryuji's birthday! I have to get him a present!" She said to herself as she walked down the streets of the Hidden Leaf. She tried to think of what her brother liked. He had a lot of handkerchiefs that he wore around his neck….. Maybe she could go to the fabric store and have them make one for him? What about a bobble head? He collected those too….. But he had so many of both….. What to do…?

She stepped into the souvenir shop and browsed for a bit, looking at the bobble heads.

"Can I help you with something?" The shopkeeper asked, walking up behind her. "Oh! Your Ryuji Uzumaki's little sister, aren't you? Looking for a bobble head for him?"

"Yeah," She told the shopkeeper. "Do you have one?"

"Well I figured his birthday was coming up, so I saved a very special one for someone that wanted to shop for him." He goes into the back and looks around for a bit making a lot of noise. He returns with a bobble head of a chibi nine-tailed fox demon.

"It's so cute! I'll get it!" The shop keeper smiled and rang Inoue up for the little kitsune. He bagged it up and she left, going out to finish buying the rest of the groceries. She hid the bobble head in one of the other bags and when she got home and took off her sandals, she started to make dinner.

After about an hour, she heard Ryuji come in, throwing his boots in a lazy pile like he usually does and hanging up his jacket.

"Inoue, I'm home!"

"I know! You sound like a rampaging herd of elephants!"

"Sorry!" he called rubbing the back of his head. "What's for dinner?"

"Octopus. Your favorite. I'm almost done."

"Awesome! I'll be waiting at the table." He left the kitchen and into the dining room humming a tune to himself. He had totally forgotten it was his birthday thanks to all of the work he's been doing. Inoue came in with the octopus on a platter and a small-ish box red with a bright blue ribbon on it. "What's that?" He asked.

"Octopus."

"No, in the box."

"Oh. Your birthday present. Happy birthday, big bro!" He smiled at her, and hugged her after taking the box from her. He opened it and his smile turned into a huge grin.

"I've been looking for this one! I had all the tailed beasts but him! Thanks, Inou-chan!"

Inoue smiled, and got another hug from her brother. Hopefully this will cancel out her parent's anniversary in two weeks. But that was merely a faint hope. Because that week, everything would change.


	2. Chapter 1

Kakashi Hatake had been summoned by Lady Tsunande about an hour ago –and as usual, he was late. He lazily walked to the office building with his nose in a copy of "Make–Out Paradise". He entered the office room after walking up the stairs two at a time, and dog-eared the book, putting it back in his pocket for later.

"You summoned me, Lady Hokage?" he asked, putting his hands in a different set of pockets. Tsunande turned around, slightly annoyed that he was so late. But it was to be expected. After all, it WAS Kakashi.

"Yes, I did. I have a mission for you."

"A mission?" he echoed. "With Naruto and the others?"

"No. This is an ' _A'_ ranked mission." Kakashi got into a more serious stance. His lazy lean straightened out and his face hardened. _Good, he's getting serious_. She thought to herself. "I need you to investigate the disappearance of these young girls." She placed down several photos of girls ranging from their teens to their thirties. The only thing in common with all of them was they were young, pretty women. Kakashi looked at them one by one, without much facial expression.

"So do we have an idea of who it is?" he asked, not looking up from the photographs.

"One of the girls was recovered alive, and she gave us a rough description of the perpetrators."

Kakashi stiffened at the word "alive" It implied the others were dead now. So that's why it's an A ranked mission… people were probably dead.

"Can I see a sketch of the perps?" he asked. Tsunande handed him the sketches after a little digging around in the files. She looked at him, trying to read his expression, to see if he recognized them. But his narrowing eyes only told her he was trying to memorize what they looked like.

The first sketch showed a man with piercing blue eyes, and a slightly wrinkled face. He had crow's feet in his eyes and a deep scowl. There was no ninja headband, so he probably was just some nutcase murderer. His clothes were very plain, which might just mean the girl didn't remember what he was wearing when she escaped.

The second picture was of a younger man, possibly in his early twenties. This one had a ninja headband. He was from the Hidden Leaf. At least it wasn't an outsider. He had a slightly crooked nose and light blue hair with a dark pink streak in the bangs. _Wow ._ Kakashi thought sarcastically. _Like that's not easy to spot…_

"Is there anything else I should know?"

"Yes, two things. One, the girl said they were trying to seal a bijuu into her, so they're probably very skilled ninja. And two, Tobi is going with you."

"Tobi?" Kakashi said, quickly looking up from the sketches. "Really?"

Tsunande laughed at his slight shock. Tobi and Kakashi were very tight with each other ever since they were genin, and most of the missions she gave one, she would usually give to the other as well. They were almost like brothers. Almost.

"Yes." She said, pulling herself back together again. "In fact, he was here earlier. He told me to let you know he'll be waiting by the all you can eat buffet."

"Knowing him, He's going to be in there eating as many dumplings as he can…" he said a sweat-mark rolling down his forehead. He sighed, smiling, and raised his hand up. "Consider this mission completed, Lady Tsunande." He poofed out of the room, moving as quickly as he could to meet up with his best friend.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

A walk in the forest was something Inoue Uzumaki did a lot nowadays. Her parent's graves were close to the forest, and there were always beautiful flowers around to pick for them there. She had found a big patch of daffodils the other day, and wanted to pick a few today for Mom and Dad. Tomorrow was the anniversary of their death, which always made Ryuji a bit depressed. But she kept her head held high, not letting it get to her at all.

She pushed her long red hair out of her face as she looked for the two most beautiful flowers in the patch. There was a rustle in the trees above her and she looked up, hoping to find a blue bird or a cardinal. It was around the time of year that they popped out of their hiding spots and started to find mates. The males for both were so beautiful.

When she didn't see either species of bird, she gave a soft sigh and went back to picking flowers. About a minute later, there was another rustle, and she whipped her head to look.

"Hello?" She called out. "Is someone there?" There was a pause and no one answered her. She frowned slightly and turned back to the flowers. When she did, there was a shadow cast over her, growing larger every second. She looked up and gasped, seeing a man with light blue hair jumping down on her. She screamed, but was silenced with a sharp blow to the head.

"I got her, Bokkun!" the blue haired man called up to the treetops. "And look! I think she's an Uzumaki, too! What luck!"

An older man jumped down from the trees. He growled at the younger and slapped him across the face.

"Will you be _quiet_?" he hissed. "What if we get caught, you moron?!"

"Sorry Bokkun….." The man whispered back. "But hey, now we can do the transfer of the four-tails now, right?"

"Nyami, you _idiot_! We're too close to the grave yard! Someone's bound to notice a bijuu transfer here!"

"Oooh. Sorry, again." Nyami said shrinking away from the older man. Bokkun sighed, and flung Inoue over his shoulder.

"Let's go, before someone finds us." He jumped back into the trees, taking the young girl further into the forest.

"Right, Bokkun!" He said following his partner in crime. Unluckily for them, Kakashi and Tobi had watched the whole thing, and were preparing to follow.


	3. Chapter 2

_A/N: for those of you who don't look at my profile, this was a collab I'm doing with my good friend on Facebook, TobiThe Goodboy. I think we were both so concerned with posting the first chapter and the prologue that we forgot to mention we were doing this together. I'm hoping I can update this every few days to every week, so stay tuned for more!_

 _By the way, this is an AU fic. Most of the stuff is canon, except for a few things about the Akatsuki, which I'm hoping to elaborate on later. It's basically just they aren't bad guys. TobiThe Goodboy wanted Tobi to work closely with Kakashi to add a comedic effect, so we had to rearrange a few things in the universe to make it fit. But otherwise, things are 100% the same._

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"Inoue, I'm home!" Ryuji called into the house. He threw his shoes off as he usually did and hung up his jacket, waiting for his little sister to reply. Minutes passed and there was no sound from her at all. "That's strange." He mumbled to himself. He stared to look around the house, and still couldn't see her. He checked her room first, thinking she might be asleep. When she wasn't there, he checked the the bathroom and the kitchen. Still nothing.

Becoming very worried, he debated going to look for her. He put his shoes and jacket back on and leaves the house, hoping she was alright. He flew through the trees swiftly, jumping from branch to branch. What if Inoue was hurt? Would she be ok? Maybe she was just picking flowers... But she should be home by now. Something _must_ have happened to her.

"Oh, Inoue-Chan…. What happened….?" He mumbled to himself. He paused to catch his breath, and saw a silver haired and masked ninja waiting in the treetops. He looked down, following their line of sight. Two ninja were setting up camp for the night. When Ryuji wasn't looking, the masked ninja and his silver haired friend jumped down. He threw 3 kunai down in between them, knowing he had to rescue his little sister. Big mistake on his part.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"Do you thinkThey'll go to sleep soon?" Tobi asked, looking at Kakashi.

"I hope so. That girl might be in big trouble." He answered in a whisper. "We need to make sure these are our guys."

"Kakashi." Tobi said in his normal voice. He only ever did that when he was being serious, or when someone sounds like more of a retard than he does. Knowing it was the latter, the silver haired ninja facepalmed for his stupidity. Of course these were the right guys. They attacked the girl and brought her here. Why wouldn't they be the guys they were looking for? Besides, they matched the description perfectly.

Finally, the two perps started to call it a night. It wasn't that late, really. But there they were. Setting up their sleeping bags. Idiots. Kakashi noticed that they had tied up the girl too. Probably so she couldn't escape. It was a smarter move on their part, if they really were trying to seal a bijuu into her.

Kakashi and Tobi jumped from the tree in front of the two ninja, having been fed up with waiting. They stared at the two friends in shock; their half unrolled sleeping bags still in their hands. Kakashi was about to make a move when 3 kunai knives were thrown between Tobi and him, which made the jonin back up a little.

The two ninja had thrown Inoue away on the ground a little too forcefully earlier, and since she was tied up, she had no way of holding her head to create the illusion of easing her pain. A deep voice cut through the forest in a loud growl and another bunch of kunai were aimed at both on Kakashi and the perps. As Kakashi tried to follow where the kunai was thrown from, Ryuji jumped into the not-yet-started battle with another kunai in hand, pointing towards Kakashi. Tobi had begun fighting the perps as his best friend and the Uzumaki brother had a tense moment, assessing the situation before them.

Tobi was obviously winning his one-sided fight, since every attack the perps made went right through him. Every time they missed, Tobi landed a powerful blow to their bodies, knocking them around like ragdolls.

Kakashi and Ryuji began fighting fiercely. Ryuji was no longer using kunai. Instead he shifted to ninjutsu, attempting to get the upper hand. What both he and Kakashi didn't realize was that they were on the same side. Kakashi tried to use a fire style but Ryuji blocked it using his earth style. The agitated jonin disappeared and reappeared behind the Uzumaki brother, catching the younger jonin off guard. Kakashi quickly weaved his hand signs to activate his chidori. The electricity crackled and chirped behind the younger jonin, causing him to realize who he was fighting. But before he could stop him, everything went white from the immense pain in his chest. He would never feel the light of day again. Ryuji Uzumaki was dead.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Inoue was trying hard to get up. Her head felt dizzy and she could feel the throbbing in her head like a powerful drum. She tried her best to concentrate, attempting to ignore the pain. She looked up and she just froze. She saw the silver haired ninja behind his brother, lightning in his hand. His brother was frozen in fear. She tried to yell to him, but her voice was caught in her throat. The silver haired man's lighting pierced through his brother's chest, making him cough up a waterfall of blood. She watched as her fell to the ground with a final thud, dead after the ninja pulled his hand away. Suddenly, a high pitched scream was heard from the Inoue, forcing all of the remaining ninja to turn towards her. She was desperately trying to move towards the dead body of his elder brother while whimpering.

"Nii-san….! N-Nii-san….!"

Kakashi's eyes widened as he finally understood that the man whom he just killed was not the enemy, but the girl's brother. He was just trying to protect his sister. Before Kakashi or Tobi could do anything, Nyami—who had disappeared a while ago—suddenly appeared behind Inoue. He was pulling her hair forcefully, forcing her to stand on her legs, while tears fell down her cheeks. He then took a kunai and held it near her neck.

"One more step and I slit the Uzumaki's throat!"

Too fast for the blue haired ninja to react, Tobi suddenly disappeared and reappeared behind him and killed him with his kunai

"One down, one more to go senpai!'. Inoue fell to the floor and passed out from the sheer trauma of what happened. Kakashi took care of the older man with ease, and picked up Inoue after making sure the two of them were dead. Tobi picked up he bodies and they made their way back to the Hidden Leaf in silence.


	4. Chapter 3

Tobi wanted to break the silence somehow. Kakashi hasn't been like this since Rin died. She was their best friend, and one of their former teammates. The silver haired ninja was silent for weeks when it happened, and he barely ate at all for a month or so. He blamed himself for her death. If she were still alive, would they both be different?

"Hey, Kakashi….?" Tobi started, ditching his silly voice for a while. It wouldn't help, and he knew it. "It's not your fault. You didn't know if he was with these guys or not." He held up the two bodies as he mentioned them

Kakashi looked at Tobi briefly, and a fake smile crept up under his mask.

"I'm not upset. I'm just trying to think of how to tell the girl."

The masked man sighed in relief, glad his friend wasn't dwelling on what he did today. Morning eventually came and they made their way back to the village together. They arrived at Tsunande's office after bringing Inoue to the hospital for treatment. The doctors said it was a decent concussion and possible PTSD in the future after hearing what happened from the two friends.

"Good work you two." Tsunande said smiling. She motioned for one of the Anbu guards by the door to come in, and had him take the bodies of the perps out. "Your payment for this mission will come in the mail by this afternoon. You're dismissed."

"Yes Ma'am!" they chirped to the Hokage, before poofing out of the room. When Kakashi arrived to his home, he decided he had enough time for a shower and something to eat before going to see the rest of Team 7. He ended up passing out for the day in his bed instead of meeting his students for training.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"WHERE THE HELL IS HE!?" a pink haired kunoichi bellowed, scaring the birds. "He's always late!" She turned to the two other ninja, who were just as irritated as she was. They knew by now Kakashi would be late for just about everything. Especially when it concerned their squad. But rthis was ridiculous! It was almost sundown!

"Maybe we should head home." The blonde boy next to her suggested. "It's later than usual, and we might not have time to train today once he does come."

"Do you think….?" The pink haired girl started. The raven haired boy was sitting on the railing of the bridge, teetering back and forth between jumping down and falling into the river. He looked up at his companions, with no emotions on his face. "Do you think something happened to him?"She looked to the sunset, her anger ebbing and being replaced by panic. "What if Kakashi-sensei is hurt?"

"You guys are crazy!" The blond blurted with a frown. "He's one of the best ninja there is! There's no way he would be hurt!"

"You never know, Naruto. It could be anything." The raven haired boy said. "But now that you mentioned it, he could've just slept late or something and forgot all about us."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Inoue's head throbbed with the worst migraine she's ever had. It hurt to turn her head at all, and it even hurt to think about moving her head. After a few minutes, she managed to open her eyes to a dark, empty room. A cool breeze brushed her cheeks and she took a minute to look up to the source. There was an open window to the left of her, cracked just enough to let her see a few stars in the night sky.

A slight creaking was heard to her right, and a bit of light filtered in. But when she turned to look at what made the noise, the light had vanished and the noise had stopped. Listening carefully, she heard a rhythmic and dull blooping noise coming from outside in what she guessed was a hallway next to her room. Closing her eyes, she tried her best to understand the world around her. She knew it was dark. It must be night time. She knew there was a window cracked open, and she was on a bed. She must be inside. The blooping was familiar. It reminded her of a heart monitor. If that was the case, she was in a hospital.

She drifted off into oblivion before she could let it sink in properly. She would just have to deal with that fact later, when she wasn't in so much pain.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Arriving at the bridge where Kakashi and his students normally met, Tobi was unsure of what to tell said students. He had gone to the silver haired ninja's house to clean up after the mission and asked if he could use his shower. Of course, his best friend said yes. He was still a little spaced out, and he looked physically and emotionally exhausted. When his shower was finished and he had gotten dressed and put his orange mask back on, he thought suggesting a hot shower would be a good idea. It would help relieve the stress his friend was experiencing.

He marched into the bedroom, rather pleased with himself, but found the copy ninja fast asleep on his bed, snoring softly. Rather than wake him, Tobi decided to let him continue resting. He would let his students know there was no training today. But what to tell them?

"Tobi-san?" The pink haired girl asked. "Where's Kakashi-sensei?"

"Well, he hasn't had a very good couple of days. He fell asleep a few hours ago and I didn't have the heart to wake him up."

"So he's fine?"

"He should be back in action tomorrow, yes~!" The three genin nodded and thanked him, and they all left in different directions. Only one was still worried about Kakashi.


	5. Chapter 4

The sun shone directly in Kakashi's eyes, making it hard to stay in the restful sleep he was in. He groaned, hearing the alarm clock go off. It screeched loudly, and the silver haired man slapped the clock repeatedly, his hand searching for the off button. He managed to find it, hearing the click as he pressed it, and the loud noise of the alarm finally stopped. He rolled out of the bed lazily, crashing to the floor with a dull thump. He groaned and got into a sitting position, rubbing the small bump forming on his head.

He went over to his dresser and pulled out his clothes, getting undressed for a shower. He realized he forgot to go see Team 7 for their training, so he would have to go apologize after he saw the girl at the hospital. Sakura might have work at the hospital today. He could explain what happened to her first.

He hopped into the shower, taking a moment to soak in the warm water. He grabbed the bar of soap on the side of the tub and lathered himself up. He rinsed and shampooed his hair, then did another rinse and got out. He put a towel around his waist and used a second towel to dry his hair, noticing how wet his silver locks were. After a few minutes of dripping, Kakashi put on his clothes, and then his jonin jacket, and headed out to leave for the hospital.

He finally arrived, after buying some take out for the girl, knowing that the food at the hospital sucked. It was one of the many reasons he hated hospitals.

"Hello Kakashi." The nurse at the desk beamed with a sickeningly sweet smile. Reason number two he hated hospitals: everyone was unrealistically positive. "Looking for Inoue?"

"Yeah. Is it ok that I brought her take out?" He asked. The nurse nodded and got up from the desk, pointing down the hallway.

"She's in room 10, on the left."

"Thanks." he said, making his way down the hall. Room 10 was fairly close to the front desk. He entered the room with a knock, peeking his head in. "Hello? Inoue?"

"Yeah? Come in!" she chirped upon seeing him. He walked over to the bed, pulling up a chair and sitting next to her. "You're Kakashi Hatake, right? The Copy Ninja?"

"That's me." he answered, rubbing the back of his neck, slightly embarrassed that she already knew his name. "How are you feeling?"

"Headache-y. Sakura-san said it looked like I lost a few of my memories. But there wasn't any lasting damage to my brain."

"Oh?" What was that supposed to mean? Did she not remember him killing Ryuji? Or was it something else? He suddenly remembered the take-out bag in his hand and held it up to her. "Want some Chinese?" he offered.

She smiled and nodded, taking out a box of Lo Mein and eating it. They spent the rest of the morning talking about nothing in particular, and started getting to know each other. By 12 noon, Kakashi left to see his team, with a slightly fluttered heart thumping in his chest. The rest of the Team noticed he was less alert than usual, and for once he wasn't reading his pervy book.

"30 dollars says Kakashi Sensei is in love!" Naruto whispered to his teammates.

"Yeah right, you big loser."

"Why don't we make the bet then?"

"No." the raven haired boy growled.

"I'll take you on!" Sakura whispered back. "But let's make it 50 dollars."

"You're on, Sakura!"

They spent the rest of the day trying to figure out if their sensei was really in love or not.


	6. Chapter 5

Sitting down by the memorial he went to with Tobi, Kakashi stared at the stone with his friend's name written on it. _Rin Nohara_. The only genin in their team to die that day. If it weren't for her, they would have never gotten away from those ninja alive. His Mangekyo and Tobi's would have never awakened.

Now there was a story. Dear reader, I can tell you are wondering: How did Kakashi get the sharingan if Obito didn't die? Well let me tell you in a flashback.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

 _"Obito!" Kakashi shouted fearfully. The large boulder was about to fall on the raven haired boy, but just before it did, Kakashi had managed to push him out of the way, getting his foot caught underneath the massive stone sphere. He cried out in agony and gritted his teeth from the pain. Tears came to the young jonin's eyes, and he barely noticed his teammates come over._

 _"K-Kakashi!" Rin squeaked, covering her mouth with her hands._

 _"We have to get him out!" Obito said._

 _"Well well well... looks like your strongest member is finished." A voice said. It was the ninja from before!_

 _"Shit... Rin, get Kakashi out of there! Cut his foot of if you have to!" The brunette nodded as the Uchiha sprang into action. He made his way to the meet up point Minato Sensei had mentioned earlier, in hopes to find the blonde jonin and get him to help._

 _Rin watched as Obito left, and turned to the silver haired ninja, who was moaning in pain._

 _"It'll be ok, Kakashi."_

 _"Grrt..." Kakashi grunted. "Jus' gemmie out..."_

 _Rin nodded and took out her Kunai. Kakashi winced, preparing for her to amputate. but the sound of metal hitting rock was heard instead._

 _"What are you doing...?"_

 _"Trying to... Ungh! Get you free! Nngh! What does it... hff... look like i'm doing?"_

 _"Your going to chip away at the rock?" He said the frown evident in his voice._

 _"Yeah! If i cut off your... Gah!" She shielded her eyes from the shrapnel. "Iff i cut off your foot, You would bleed to death!"_

 _"Oh..." he said. The darkness was beginning to consume him. The pain was too much. He began to fade into the oblivion, the only sounds being the clinking of metal hitting rock, and Rin's grunting. Then... nothing._

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"Tobi. How did Rin get me out from under that boulder?" Kakashi asked, still staring at the rock.

"I'm not sure." He said, using his serious voice. "She said she was there for hours chipping away at the rock, trying to dig you out from underneath."

"But when i woke up I was at the hospital, and my foot was fine."

"Yeah. You were asleep for about a month. Rin though you were dead. She blamed herself the whole time..." He said solomnly remembering. "But... That was the day I gave you my Sharingan, wasn't it?" He said in his more silly voice.

"Yeah, it was. Why did you give it to me though?" Kakashi asked, turning to the Akatsuki member.

"Well..." He said rubbing the back of his head. "I figured it was the best present to give you for becoming a Jonin after Rin... You know..."

"I see." Kakashi nodded. "Well, i have to go see the rest of Team 7. Say Hi to Kakuzu for me, ok?"

"Got it!"


	7. Chapter 6

Ah, the Akatsuki. Within the canon fandom, they are an organization that wants to resurect the Ten Tailed Bijuu, Juubi, by collecting the other nine bijuu from their jinchurikii. But within this story, that isn't their goal, or their purpose. They weren't formed by Nagato. In fact, the governments of the world of shinobi formed them. Each major Nation,(eg Land of Fire, Land of Lightning...) hand picked ninja depending on their ninja population.

Their goal was to keep the peace between the nations as representatives for their nations. Essentially, they were like ambassadors that could kick your ass three ways from sunday.

Itatchi was picked to represent the Land of Fire as a replacement for Orochimaru after his death a few years back. And no, He didn't wipe out the Uchiha clan. For god's sakes, he's a good guy in this fic!

Anyways...

Tobi flitted through the trees, making his way to the Land of Fire's Akatsuki headquarters. There was a meeting here today for the members to update each other on their nation's problems to see if they could find a solution.

The masked ninja landed just behind Hidan silently, seeing he once again had his headphones in, listening to his music. Playing the air drums, the devout Jashinist had no clue there was an Uchiha behind him, waiting to scare the immortality out of him.

Kakuzu was sitting in front of the white haired immortal and smiled, eager to see if his friend would scare his partner. He tapped Hidan on the shoulder and pulled imaginary earphones out of his head. Hidan took his real ones out with a frown.

"What is it?"

"BOO!"

"SON OF A-!" Hidan said jumping as Tobi grabbed his shoulders shouting. Kakuzu began laughing and fell out of his seat, holding his sides.

"Owowowowowowow~!" Kakuzu laughed. "My sides hur-hur-hur-hurt! Ah ha ha ha!"

"Damnit Tobi!" Hidan screeched, then began laughing as well watching Kakuzu as he rolled on the floor.

"Bro, he's dying!" Hidan chuckled.

"The rare disease: Laughingtooharditis!" Tobi said, some how changing into a doctor's outfit.

"Whats the cure doctor?" Hidan said, having somehow changed into a pink nurse's outfit, raising his voice to a feminine pitch.

"Its simple, really! CPR!" Hidan laughed getting on top of his partner and pretending to do CPR, making Kakuzu laugh even more. The dark skinned ninja began begging for them to stop and Hidan got off, chuckling. The moment passed and they all sat there panting and giggling.

"My fucking sides hurt like fucking hell, bruh." Kakuzu said panting slightly.

"Do I look good in pink?" Hidan asked.

"Totally." Tobi Chuckled.

"Your so gay Hidan." Kakuzu said sitting up with a smile.

"At leat I don't look like a chick coughDeidaracoughcough!"

"You guys talking about me?!" Deidara said from across the room.

"No!" The three of them said in unison, sharing a look.

 **A/N: As most of you know, These characters are acting a bit... Different. Remembering that this story is set in and alternate universe, the backstories could be altered. None of the akatsuki are going to be like how they are in canon. ALL of them are friends, instead of being annoyed by each other.**


	8. Chapter 7

Nagato and Konan sat at the head of the meeting table, looking at the rest of the akastsuki. They were divided into sections based on the different villages they came from. Kakuzu sat relatively close to Kisame, while the two Uchiha's sat directly next to each other. Hidan sat to Kakuzu's left, and Sasori and Deidara sat across from Kisame. Zetsu sat at the far end of the table from Nagato and Yahiko and the Six Paths stood behind the red headed leader.

"So. Who's going to start us off?" Nagato prompted.

"I will." Kakuzu said, folding his hands under his chin. "The Hidden Waterfall has been having financial troubles due to raids by several groups of bandits. Our leader has asked that I request assistance from a village that currently has an abundance of Chunin and jonin."

"The Hidden Sand should be able to offer a bit of support, but it won't be much." Sasori said.

"The Hidden Leaf might be able to spare a ninja or two. But we also need some support in finding several young women." Tobi said. Itatchi looked at him, raising an eyebrow at the older Uchiha. "It isn't a top prority compared to The Hidden Waterfall's dilemma, but it needs to be taken into consideration."

"How many ninja would you need?" Hidan asked.

"Possibly two or three at the most."

"We can supply a chunin and some genin." Hidan said. Tobi nodded and sat back.

"Anyone else have updates?"

"Iwagakure seems to have an abundance of resources at the moment. Once the bandits are taken care of, we could offer some of our surplus to The Hidden Waterfall." Deidara said.

"We'll take you up on that offer, Deidara. Thank you." Kakuzu said.

Nagato looked around for a moment, waiting for the others to speak. When no one did he closed his eyes and nodded.

"Alright. Meeting adjourned." Everyone got up and slowly made their way to the exits, then back to their villages to report the news to their village leaders.

As Itatchi and Tobi made their way back, the masked Uchiha noticed the younger seemed a little spaced out.

"You ok, Itatchi?" He asked, his voice losing the silly edge for the moment.

"Huh? Yeah. I was just thinking about seeing Sasuke again. I haven't seen him in a few weeks."

"You sure love him, don't you? I wish you were my big brother." He said with a chuckle.

"Um... Tobi-sensei?" Itatchi started looking to the older.

"Mm?" Tobi hummed, stopping on a tree. Itatchi stopped next to him on the same branch, pausing as he tried to word it right.

"Have you ever fallen in love with someone... and didn't know how to tell them?"

"Brotherly? Or romantically?"

"Romantically."

"Oh? Does Itatchi-kun have a crush on someone? Is it Konan~?" He teased returning to his silly voice.

"No!" The younger blushed a deep shade of red. "Konan is to old!"

"I know, i know. I'm just teasing."

"You havent answered my question." He said to the masked man, staring expectantly at him, his blush beginning to fade.

"Hm? Oh, right. Yes i have. Her name was Rin Nohara." He said. "But... well... she didn't love me back. She was madly in love with Kakashi. He never returned her affections though, until after she commited suicide."

"What? Why did she do that?" The younger asked, shocked.

"Kakashi was in a coma for a few months, and the doctors were afraid he wouldn't come out. He woke up hours after she killed herself, and a few minutes before they were going to pull the plug."

"Thats terrible." He said. "But... did you ever tell her you loved her?"

"No. I knew she didn't feel the same way. I didn't want to ruin our friendship with the three of us."

"I see."

"I'm sorry if this wasn't a big help to your problem."

"It's fine. Lets head back." Tobi nodded, and they continued back to the village.


End file.
